Thursday, July 31, 2008

Still No News............

This wait is so hard. I just can't beleive that we have had I600 approval for over a month now & we still have no idea when we are going to travel. The 2 families that are ready to travel now still hasn't gotten their travel call & I feel certain we will not move forward until they come & go.
I go back to work on Monday, my 4 weeks vacation is now over and it makes me so sad to know that I always thought I would at least be in VietNam by now. But no, now I will have to go back to work & then take my leave when we do get our travel call. I can't help but be "oh so sad".
Actually it's more than being sad, it breaks my heart. I miss Zane so much and it has absolutely nothing with lack of faith. I know that God is going to bring Zane home, I just wish it was NOW!

Saturday, July 26, 2008

We Have Our Visas

Our visas came yesterday. They were only gone 3 days so I was quite impressed.
They are valid through October 29,2008. If we haven't brought Zane home by the end of October I will need to be committed!!
We are still waiting on some final signatures from our province leader before traveling so please, please, please keep us in your prayers.
I was so hoping & praying we would be home with Zane by the time Kaitlyn started back to school on August 19th, but we are running out of time.
I hate the thoughts of her missing 2 weeks of school after she just starts back, but I hate even more the thoughts of leaving her & Chloe behind. I just can't do that!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Dog Paddling

That's right, I am dog paddling!
I have decided that I am not going to let satan try to convince me that I am going to drown, but instead I am holding my head above water & continue PRAISING HIM for bringing my son home........
I was telling my friend April just last night that for weeks now when I pray, I don't ask God to bring Zane home, but I specifically praise Him for giving us our Decision of Adoption, and praise Him for our Invitation to Travel, and praise Him for our Giving & Receiving Ceremony & most importantly I have been praising Him for bringing Zane home where the very first thing we are going to do is dedicate him to God.
I went to bed with the thoughts of our conversation on my mind last night & when I woke up this morning, the first thought that entered my mind was "you need to put I Will Praise You In This Storm by Casting Crowns on your blog". It was almost as if the Holy Spirit had directed me to do this and I truly beleive He has.
Anyway, I told Daniel & April both today that I was applying for our visas today. I felt that today was the day to do this & we had always stepped out on faith and I felt strongly that we should today and no matter what we had to PRAISE HIM.
I got off the phone with April and went to the post office, I must admit I was a bit nervous about mailing off our passports and that $440 for visas, so before I sealed the envelope I just prayed and asked the Lord to let me be doing the right thing and I was going to just praise Him for bringing Zane home. I paid the $476 (yikes) and left the post office. As soon as I got in my jeep I turned the radio on and "I Will Praise You In This Storm" had just started playing.
I just thanked God for giving me this sign today. I know it was from Him and I know we are doing exactly what we are suppose to be doing.
So yes, I am dog paddling! I know the next few weeks are going to be difficult because the waiting is so hard, but I am determined to keep my head above the water & PRAISE HIM!

I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say “Amen”, and it’s still raining

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry
You raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can’t find You

As the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
“I’m with you”
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away

I’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The Maker of Heaven and Earth

I’ll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
Every tear I’ve cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

Friday, July 18, 2008

Trying Very Hard Not To Drown............

We now have both DIA & I600 approval, I should be the happiest mommy in the world, but right now all I feel is sadness & guilt. I am so sad because this overwhelming need to hold my son is almost consuming me these days. It's been over 2 weeks now since our last approval, I should be applying for our visas & packing but instead we are still waiting for our "Decision of Adoption" from the leader of our province.
This same leader that doesn't appear to come to work every day because we have 2 other families ahead of us that still hasn't traveled yet because they are still waiting on him to sign theirs. Why does it have to be so hard?
After getting those 2 pictures last week and seeing how Zane is losing that chubby baby face, I just want to weep over all that I am missing. I should know better. Chloe is proof that God's timing is perfect, I truly know that with all of my being but I still miss Zane so much.
Thus, the guilt comes in.......I know I should be praising the Lord and I am. I continue to praise Him even though my heart is breaking because I have never held Zane or touched his sweet face. I have missed his first steps and I am to the point that I want to weep at the mere thoughts of how much longer it could be before we travel to Vietnam to bring our precious gift from God home. I am trying so hard to always thank God for Zane and for bringing us this far, but I am only human and this mother's heart wants her son home now. I want to cry out to my heavenly father and beg him to bring Zane home now, but yet, I know in my heart he isn't going to come home until God says, "It is time".
Please pray for me, but most importantly please pray for Zane............

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

New pics of Zane...............

I got a pleasant surprise last night when I received 2 new pictures of Zane from our agency. I would have loved to have more but am so thankful I at least got these.
He looks so happy & healthy. I just can't get over how much he has grown in the past few weeks, he is starting to look more like a little boy than a baby.
We are still waiting on some final steps from our province so I have no idea when we will travel, but we are praying it is soon.
Just knowing we have both DIA & I600 approval makes the wait easier, but I am like Chloe and I am ready to get on that big airplane and go get him.
Please keep praying him home!


****please pray for a very special friend of mine that got disappointing news today.
I don't have to give a name because God knows exactly who she is.
Thank you for your prayers!

Friday, July 4, 2008

4th of July at Hilton Head

Every year we meet Joe, Julie, and Abigail at Hilton Head for the week of 4th of July. Chloe & Abigail are truly best friends forever and like to even call themselves sisters. I only have 1 picture of Kaitlyn because she is 12 going on 22 and hates to have her picture made. We have had a wonderful time and hate to leave to go home tomorrow, but can't wait till next year when we will have Zane here with us.









Thursday, July 3, 2008

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Proverbs 25:25
Good news from far away, is like cold water to the thirsty.

ZANE HAS I600 APPROVAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This means that our adoption has been now approved by both the Vietnamese & the US Government and the only thing left is for the province that he lives in to finish their paperwork and send us a letter of invitation so that we may come to Vietnam for our Giving & Receiving Ceremony.
Please pray these final steps go quickly & smoothly.
Thank you so much for your continued prayers!!!!!!!!